I find the sweet spot to be at deferring feature updates for 60 days, and security updates for 8 (just enough to make sure a week passes before any issues are found, just in case).

For example, I just received update 1909, which was released starting in November 2019: https://www.howtogeek.com/437112/whats-new-in-windows-10s-19h2-update-arriving-fall-2019/ , more than enough time to fix its rough edges.